Elucubration Inspiration

Posted on May 29, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

Work twelve. Book six. Actually, work thirteen hours, book six-ish; but hey, let’s not get picky here. Either way it’s a long day. My life has improved. Last year I was working ten or twelve hour days, working on lots of projects, and making far too little money. This year I am working ten or twelve or thirteen hour days, working on just as many projects, and being paid for about half of my time. I’ve also recently learned that I probably qualify for a massive modification to my mortgage if I can double my income. That can work, as long as it doesn’t require me to double my working hours. Ah, but there must be a solution. Many agree and are searching too.

The inspiration for today’s post comes from too many of my friends who have similar work schedules. We may think we’re running our own businesses, but our businesses are also running us. A lot of socializing has stopped. I no longer hold parties, partly because of money, partly because the house is for sale, 8199 Cultus Drive, Clinton WA 98236 partly because many of my friends don’t have spare time, even on weekends. My Sunday evening oasis, when I don’t work after 6pm unless absolutely necessary, has had a dearth of dinner guests because I’ve been to busy to invite folks, and the invitations I send out can’t be accepted because they’re too tired. In a way, this is actually good news. I miss my friends, but I know they are making more than last year; and I don’t want to get in the way of that.

The inspiration for today’s title comes from friend and blogger, Erin Waterman.
“What the heck does elucubrating mean, you ask?  I’ve been “burning the midnight oil” this week with several contract jobs and studies, and the verb elucubrate meant to work studiously by candle light.  Because this word has become extinct, I decided to bring it back.” Elucubrating and Car Repair – Erin Wateman
Pardon me as I step away to light an oil lamp on this grey and rainy morning.Elucubration

The hardest workers I know are sole-proprietors. It is commonly accepted that the first few years will be tough. Ah, but then they finally start making money. But it isn’t enough, and because the business is under their control, they can work harder in hopes of making more. Usually though, such businesses start out by charging less than the competition, so all of those extra hours may not add up to enough. Raising prices can scare away customers and clients, but it becomes necessary. Imagine the celebration of success though when working extraordinary hours finally makes enough. Great! Of course, there may not be much time for celebration, or even a bit of life. Now, the choice becomes growing the business by working even more, raising prices and risking the business, or hiring someone which drives up costs which means the business must grow that much faster – or giving up and using the experience as a great resume line as a proprietor tries to become someone else’s employee. And finding time to apply for jobs is not easy. I’ve been so busy making half of what I need that I haven’t been able to apply to as many positions as I did three months ago. In some ways, the luckiest business owners can free themselves by selling their businesses, but that can be difficult emotionally.

I know printers, framers, seamstresses, herbalists, bookkeepers, artists, writers, healers, and more who are in such a situation.

As tough as I make it sound, many would only consider taking a job to gain security and benefits, and recent corporate history discourages them from expecting that. One friend managed to get a very nice job at T-Mobile, only to get laid off months later. So much for stability. Her response is to keep applying for jobs, but to also finish her manuscript, build out her micro-farm, and reach out to others to build a community.

Pardon me as I step away to handle a job email.

I’m an advocate of personal financial independence. Getting there through a lottery jackpot is fine, but most folks have to save to get there. I managed to retire (temporarily evidently) at 38 because I spent less than I made and invested the rest. It turns out to be the simplified version of the 9-step program championed by New Road Map Foundation (where I’ve been the Board Secretary and am now the Information Manager) and popularized by the book, Your Money Or Your Life, which includes me as a case study in the new edition. The trick for most folks above the poverty line who haven’t encountered any of life’s misfortunes, is to spend less than they make. Staying out of debt is major as well. The trick for many early entrepreneurs is to make enough, then to grow enough, then to finally begin paying themselves with time for themself, and paying into their future by saving. The same potential exists, but the steps may take more effort.

This is no startling revelation, or deep analysis of the news. This is an acknowledgement of how many hidden steps there are on the entrepreneur’s path to financial security.

There’s a solidity to corporate dealings. For employees: paychecks are usually regular, raises are usually a few percent, benefits vary (or decline) around a norm. For customers: prices are what prices are, complaints can be moved up the line within a faceless bureaucracy, returns are relatively easy.

For small businesses the paychecks are called invoices or receipts and may get paid at the customer’s convenience, raises only make sense when there’s a history of surpluses, benefits are expensive, and customers are more likely to negotiate prices, and may not believe that the person they are complaining too is the entire organizational chart and that a return actually has an impact.

This may be no startling revelation, but as the prospect of a life-long career or of being re-hired into the world of cubicles becomes less common a new segment of our population will follow a path of many steps created by others out of necessity. My friends that are on the cusp of success may find themselves being valued as guides because of their experience. Who else better to turn to than a seamstress who has 12,000 people visiting her site every week; a couple of fine herbalists that are enjoying the business in bitters, and who have that much more to offer; and a print shop that is getting to be nationally known for innovation and quality work? And of course, there’s me and my businesses, including my role as a consultant for which another consultant has suggested that I am charging too little. My hourly rate for individuals is $60. My daily rate for corporations is $1,500. He figures I am worth $3,000/day; but, you see, I have to build the business and I’m not quite making enough yet, and I don’t want to scare away customers, and – that’s why I am an optimist. Because that potential is there, and my best next step is to continue stepping in the same direction. And to go out and make sure I have enough lamp oil. In the meantime, I’m going to get back to elucubration.

photo credit - Sue Averett

photo credit – Sue Averett

PS This post is a fine example of how I must manage time. I refer to my necessarily long acronym:
IIHMTIWHMIS
If I Had More Time I Would Have Made It Shorter

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Double Header Jobs And Houses

Posted on May 25, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

My Jobs Report Month 21 was supposed to be the title of today’s post, the necessary update to last month’s post, but a critical foreclosure conversation happened at the normal post time of Saturday morning. In other words, a meeting about my house came up. The two topics are entwined, as they are for most people. Both have entered a new phase. The everchanging story is one reason there is no typical foreclosure story. Those of us going through this are all episodes in some phenomenally large book.

Even Wednesday’s story and then Thursday’s story changed moments after they were posted. Tuesday, some official type taped a Notice of Default to my front door. Notice of Default May 21, 2013 Go back for details. I expected a Notice of Foreclosure, but didn’t complain about not getting it. There was a fourth sheet that mentioned foreclosure, but it didn’t seem to be a prime part of the package. So, Wednesday I posted about Tuesday’s shock. The shock was that I thought they’d said they were going to give me much more time. The other shock was because the taper told me they may sell my house in 30 days. The official notice on the door was good inspiration for finally calling the WA State hotline to find out if I had to start packing. (1-877-894-4663, operated by Parkview Services – a non-profit) I wrote about that, posted the post and shared it around. Knock, knock. My friendly mail carrier shyly had to deliver bad news, several registered letters. I decided you were probably already weary of my housing news, so I held off with the report; especially, when I noticed that the letters looked like copies of what was on the front door. The WA State hotline directed me to the Saturday morning meeting where and when I might get introduced to a housing counselor. That was this morning. Here is that tale.

The short version of house story: I need to make more money. Not a surprise, and actually a bit of a confirmation because that was the conclusion I came to months ago. All of that training in investing and frugality helped.

Needing to make more money leads into the jobs story. So, how’s that job search going? The job I had the greatest hopes for didn’t even give me the chance for an interview, and this is for a job that many in community pointed out to me because they saw me as an obvious fit. Oh well. The job search hasn’t produced a job, but ironically, I am so busy that I have less time to search. I continue to search, but my (part-time) job as Project Director for HCLE’s Virtual Museum is getting busier, and my (part-time) job as Information Manager for New Road Map Foundation is taking even more time than HCLE. That plus a new contract to develop a social media platform for the Whidbey Island Open Studio Tour, and a couple other projects means I’m working billable hours. Even better is that some of those jobs may expand significantly. Most involve non-profits, so that means expansion happens after fundraising. Give – not just to the non-profits I know, but give to the ones you like. They may hire people like me. Yeah!

I’m busy, but it is not enough – yet. That much work still is less than full-time and the analysis completed by the housing counseling company says I need to make more if I am going to keep the house.  Yep. I guessed and actually calculated that. It’s almost as if I have some basic understanding of money and personal finance.

Skipping the many acronyms, in terms of major steps, I am at step 2 of a 3 or 4 step process. It doesn’t feel that way. The language used by the servicing company (that I thought had been the mortgage company) is so strong that it sounds dire and final. The Servicer emphasizes the one extreme, but there is a continuum of possibilities. What I’m learning is that, at each of these steps, many different things can happen, each with different ramifications and timings, and that even the professionals within the process are prone to make mistakes. Some mistakes seem to invalidate a lot of work. Other mistakes can reset the process by weeks or months. Very few homeowners are experts or lucky enough to guess right at every action. Ironically, most of the confusion comes from the protections that work in favor of the homeowner.

After the preliminary group presentation this morning, each of us were assigned someone to talk to, not necessarily our eventual counselor, but someone who could listen and then ask the right questions. The conversation went from the general to the specific.

Maybe they were overwhelmed. Maybe I was lucky. Maybe I made a good first impression over the phone. Somehow I was teamed with one of their senior people. Excellent. I provided the three minute synopsis of what you can read as hundreds of thousands of words in these posts. My situation was simple: Single (divorced), with dramatically depleted net worth (starting with the Triple Whammy), unsuccessful at getting a job (but trying), making insufficient (though growing) income from my business, unsuccessful at selling my house (so far), and with only one mortgage and only one credit card, and living fairly frugally. Oh yeah, and I am optimistic and would like to keep the house. DSCN4419 My Hardship Letter, and yes, I’ve dutifully written one and will re-write it, should read fairly well – except for not having enough money right now.

Then came the details. You’re safe. I won’t write them up because almost everyone would understandably skip right over them. But there were two main processes, one’s for time, one’s for money.

The time process is something like:

  • clock started when I stopped paying
  • about 90 days later receive a Notice of Default
  • about 90 days later receive a Notice of Default, which just happened, but it sounds like it should have been a Notice Of Pre-Foreclosure Options
  • about 30 days later receive a Notice of Trust Sale
  • about 120 days later “They” sell the house
  • about 20 days later I must vacate the premises.

But, every date and period can be varied, sometimes shorter, more times longer. So, a 350 day process can easily extend to a year or more. WA Foreclosure Timeline 2012 From I heard, asking for an official meeting with Investor (Fannie Mae for me) with a counselor and or a mediator can put the process on hold, frequently for weeks or months. We might schedule that meeting during another meeting next week.

At any meeting everyone wants to know about the money. Got enough? Nope? Well, then there’s a four step waterfall that I’ll have to check from my notes. Here’s my understanding of it.
1) Recalculate the mortgage based on current income, with the late payments and penalties added to a new loan amount.

If that didn’t work,
2) Drop the interest rate until the payments can work, maybe as low as 2%.

If that didn’t work,
3) Extend the period up to 40 years

If that didn’t work,
4) Forebear some of the Principal, which I think of as Defer some of the Debt, effectively saying some portion of the balance is interest free, but still must be repaid at the end.

If that didn’t work, then a mortgage recalculated for current income, at a 2% rate, for a 40 year loan, that only charges interest on part of the principal, still isn’t enough of a modification.

Without going into the details, I need to make more money from my business and jobs if I plan to keep the house based on income. Basically, a 40 hour a week job, or a bunch of jobs that add up to 40 hours a week, should suffice. That was a lot of work to confirm what I knew, and the confirmation is worth a lot. These details, even in a simple case like mine, are so convoluted that it is easy to overlook possibilities. Others have to consider multiple foreclosures on their home and rental properties, or business mishaps, or estates, or divorces, or combinations.

Sometimes an expert is worth the few seconds it took them to notice the one prime flaw in the paperwork. I spent hours preparing my box of docs. DSCN4423 Two years of taxes, four months of bank statements, enough documentation to qualify for a loan, because it’s basically the same process. And I brought along the note they taped to my door. Tape included. I still haven’t fully understood it, even after study, advice, listening, and asking. A few seconds after looking at it, a glance at the last page, and then the professional stopped. Whoever prepared the document dated the notice before they were supposed to. There’s a process here, and by dating it early it suggests, at least to me, that they’d made up their mind before giving me the chance to respond. That alone may require them to start the process over again, a delay of a few weeks. I never noticed that, and didn’t realize that implication.

I am an individualist. I enjoy working in groups, but most tasks I take on myself. Look at how long it took me to finally ask for help. And as soon as I did, I found help in unexpected ways. The foreclosure process is tortuous, emotionally, and logistically. It makes sense to ask for help. But. It also makes sense to check out the person or agency. Parkview Services seems legit. From what they say, they are paid by state grants. They don’t charge a fee. Washington State is nice that way, evidently; and yet, I am going to do a bit more research. I thank them for the graphic for the timeline above. That’s the best representation of what I call, the “Nominal Process” because everything can change. But, if you are going through this, be careful who you work with because ethics and competency aren’t universal.

Change happens and things are about to change again on July 1st. I must act before that, but then may have to change what I do at that point too. I pity the counselors. They must be in continual training mode.

These few hundred words, the hours I’ll spend preparing packets for negotiation, and the hours I’ll spend considering scenarios are secondary to my main goal: making, or having, or making and having enough money to maintain and sustain a comfortable lifestyle. Live long and prosper.

It is easy to focus on the foreclosure. It is easy to focus on the house. My main focus is to remove the threat of foreclosure and keep my home. And I’ll continue trying to get a job, or add up enough jobs to make enough without hurting myself, or find another source of funds (I’ve got my lottery tickets, and MVIS.) In the meantime, I’ll also keep the house on the market, as sad as I’d be to see it go. And I’ll continue to maintain my optimism. Sometimes something as simple as a date on a form, can open a window through which good fortune can arrive.

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Notice Of What – An Update

Posted on May 23, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

Good news in the foreclosure process, I think. I made a call, took some notes, and decided to record it here for myself and others.

Typing up scribbled notes help me read my own writing later. It is a good opportunity to collect my thoughts, create a summary, and let my mind percolate through the possibilities. Here are the notes from my call to the statewide (WA) foreclosure hotline (1-877-894-4663, operated by Parkview Services – a non-profit).

I’m at Step Two of a three step process. (Astonishing, considering how many steps I feel I’ve already passed through.)
Step One: Notice of Default.
(Received by Certified Mail about three months after I stopped paying in full.)
Understandable, considering that they wouldn’t accept partial payments, so I stopped paying because I couldn’t pay the full amount without going broke.
Step Two: Notice of Default. NOT a Notice of Foreclosure despite what the person who taped the sign to my door said, despite what the mortgage person said on the phone and in the big packet they mailed.
(Received by someone taping four pieces of paper to my front door.) Notice of Default May 21, 2013
Confusing, because I expected a Notice of Foreclosure, but I am not complaining. But the confusing part was that the first three pages are a Notice of Default, with directions for Seeking Assistance (Parkview), the amount I am in arrears (which always sounds weird), and the timing of a sale that they MAY initiate IF I do nothing. Then the last page is a Foreclosure Loss Mitigation Form, which is not a Foreclosure Notice.

Okay, I won’t do nothing. I’ll do something. I decided to call the number on the sheet. And found myself talking to a very nice woman who calmly asked and answered questions, and provided a good education into my situation.

Allow me to interject my own process. Regardless of their process, I continue to work my backup plans which would bring life back to a financial normality, (while also playing the lottery to open the door to positive financial abnormalities.)

Evidently, there are two official corporations involved: The Investor, Fannie Mae: and The Servicer, Green Tree. That was a surprise. I thought Green Tree had the mortgage because I made my checks out to them. Despite all of the contentious and confusing communications from The Servicer (the capitalization makes them sound like players in a movie), the decision maker is really The Investor. Which makes me wonder why I talked to Green Tree at all, which also corroborates the advice a lot of friends passed along.

There are regular events where homeowners can seek assistance in having The Investor intervene in the process, basically delaying the Steps while they review my situation. There’s one coming up this weekend. (Memorial Day weekend? Hope I can get back in time for Mayfest.) Between now and then I have to fill out about 36 pages of documents so they can review my finances and decide whether to renegotiate my mortgage (I think). They may decide to let the process proceed.

If the housing counselor decides to intervene, they’ll apply for a three part face-to-face mediation, which probably delays the Steps by a couple of months at least.

If the housing counselor decides NOT to intervene, I’ll probably receive Step Three, a Notice of Trustee Sale (so where’s the Notice of Foreclosure?) about June 21st, with a forced house sale of about October 21st, after which I have 20 days to move out.

During all of this, up to within 11 days of the sale, I can come up with the funds and pay everything off. Which means, the house can stay on the market and be bought, I can keep trying to make money through a job or my business, and my portfolio and lottery tickets (which sometimes seem indistinguishable) have more time to help.

Note: This is the first time since I stopped paying the mortgage back in late 2012 that the story I hear from various sources is coming into focus. Until now, this was only one of too many possibilities. Thanks to everyone who added their stories and their research that provided a foundation for today’s understanding.

Through this process, in many side messages, quiet sidewalk conversations, and even during a few dances, I’ve heard stories from too many people privately overwhelmed by this process. I’m not surprised. It isn’t easy to talk about, and few would mention any of this in public. It is a painful process, designed to heighten feelings of shame, and a persistent pressure that invades every day and night. Waking up can be a reminder of the temporary nature of where you slept. In some ways, this is cruel and unusual punishment for what, a breach of contract, a crime, or merely an unfortunate financial choice?

As tough as it is, I know it could be much tougher. Missing a payment doesn’t immediately make someone homeless. I’m sure there are places in the world where that happens. This process is convoluted, and part of that is because of the homeowner protections put in place by the government. Consider that, even if they were to sell my house, I still get to stay in it for another 20 days. This entire process takes a year at a minimum. I am very thankful for that. I am not eligible nor receiving social security, a pension, or unemployment; but, I am receiving time and a place to live – and the chance to make it all right again.

Those who’ve read this blog have seen my fears. You’ve seen how I’ve fallen prey to The Servicer’s tactics, how I’ve been emotionally traumatized, and how I’ve worked at resolving the situation in a myriad of ways. You are stout folks to stick with this story. Thank you for being there.

I’ll continue to provide updates. At least I now feel better because there are fewer unknowns. I can plan for specific dates. I can continue to work my backup plans. I can continue to be optimistic that somehow this will all work out.

Stay tuned.

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Notice Of Default Or Foreclosure

Posted on May 22, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

Maybe I shouldn’t mention good news. After Saturday’s celebration of a marvelous week I was enthusiastic about my financial recovery. That’s remains true. Then, yesterday they posted a Notice of Default on my front door. Notice of Default May 21, 2013 It sounds more like a Notice of Foreclosure and definitely mentions the possibility that they’ll sell my house within 30 to 120 days. That happened a hour or so after I got the call about a family medical emergency. They both happened on a day when my portfolio witnessed other investors’ profit taking. None were a great surprise, but I had good reason to believe that the first two wouldn’t happen for months, and no reason to expect them to happen simultaneously. So, instead of writing about some of my friends’ responses to their situations, I’m going to chronicle mine, again. This period of my life has been so epic that, looking back from a few years from now, selective amnesia would probably wipe most of it from my memory. Selective amnesia is also why I think everyone should have a voice at these times, so that in the future we will remember so we can learn.

Reiterate the good news, Tom; because, looking at the positive is what will get me through. I’m getting into a groove as Project Director for the HCLE Virtual Museum, and as Information Manager for New Road Map. Together they make less than a half-time job, which means there is room for a short-term part-time interesting gig for Whidbey’s art community, which I won’t announce until they do. And there are at least three other opportunities that have yet to commit, or to even pass along their requirements and compensations. I don’t recall any more art sales since Saturday, but one local bookstore sold out of the book that’s the basis of this blog. Dream. Invest. Live. They asked for more copies and I was happy to deliver them. I expected some pull back in the stocks after their marvelous jump, but Monday surprised me with a continued rise. AMSC, GIG, MVIS, and RSOL have all had recent jumps, and have all pulled back, but are all above their recent lows. My portfolio has regained enough value to eclipse my credit card debt, but not enough to retire the mortgage.

So, logically and strategically, my life is improving. Life, however, is also emotion. Emotionally, the stocks weren’t a cause for celebration, the family news dimmed my spirits a bit, and then the Notice of Default knocked me off balance. Logically, I should call the list of phone numbers on the Notice, and I shall. Emotionally, I know I should take a few breaths, regain some balance, and then make those calls in a more logical frame of mind.

In the meantime, I’ve taken the modern move of mentioning the notice on Facebook. Some argue that social media is narcissistic or self-centered, if there’s even a difference, but for a single person, somewhat geographically isolated, dealing with personal news later than the polite phone call window, posting such news is the best way to find community quickly. At this point, 24 people have offered advice, condolences, and similar stories. A few have reached me more privately with more personal questions and more detailed suggestions. One even was kind enough to do some quick research that suggests I have 140 days before having to move. If so, I have until the beginning of October to find a place to stay.

Logically, 140 days is a lot of opportunity. While that may be the best guess, my emotions are driven by the phrase on the sheet “a notice of sale may be issued as soon as 30 days from the date of this notice of default”.

I am in a race. My business is improving. The social media consulting is doing particularly well. (“I learned as much from you in three hours as I did in two years on my own.”) My portfolio is improving (just not as I type.) The housing market in and around Seattle is improving. I liked the rumored factoid that the majority of house sales in Seattle are the result of multiple bids. (My house is for sale.) Home For Sale There’s even been the rumor of the suggestion of a possible full-time job (gasp!). Races are defined by timing, and most of those revenues are due next month at the earliest. The sum of the guaranteed receivables is still less than enough to forestall the foreclosure. The sum of the possible receivables is much more than enough. The mortgage entrant in the race is inexorable, and yet mysterious. The paperwork involves many waffle words, they “may” do this or that. Money is power and until I have sufficient funds, they are in control. I’m racing to get control back, and to finish this race by reaching my goal first.

Last night, one of my dear friends offered to start a collection for me within a particular community. I declined for a few reasons:
1) I’m an optimist and think my various plans will succeed.
2) Finding one person to buy my house is more powerful and final than asking dozens for thousands.
3) My main issue isn’t my house. My main issue is finding sufficient income, like a good job, good sales, enough students, or a large enough portfolio.
4) I know I’m not the only one in that community with this problem. If we solve it for me, we should be ready to solve it for everyone. I’m merely someone who can be public about my situation because I have no partner or dependents whose lives would be dragged into the spotlight, and because I’d like to see us get past a lot of our taboos about talking about money. To be honest about that I have to be willing to be open about it in good times and in bad times. I’m really looking forward to writing about the good times again. Saturday was good practice.

The economy appears to be heading into a fragile and fragmented boom. The stock market indices are doing very well. Housing markets are improving. Unemployment is down. But the fundamentals of the economy are worrisome; e.g. Euro-debt, China’s unsustainable growth, and US Federal Debt. (Imagine the FED having to deal with a foreclosure notice taped to their front door.) Some folks are doing very well. Many are returning to old habits, as if their storm is past. But, many are finding themselves locked out of opportunity. Some employers use applicants’ credit ratings as a hiring criterion. So, if you’ve had credit problems because you couldn’t get a job, you might not be able to get a job because you have credit problems.

Is anyone surprised that millions of people bought tickets for a Powerball lottery that was worth over a half a billion dollars? The daydreams of those in similar situations to mine had an interesting commonality. Win the lottery, pay off the debt, never deal with creditors again, buy a house, go off-the-grid, and retreat from the madness after spreading the wealth to others in need. The dream is no longer to jump in and join the rest by buying luxury homes, cars, and yachts. The dream is to redefine a way of life because they’ve seen the underside of the life most folks are expected to live.

I’m an optimist. Eventually my situation will improve. Eventually our situation will improve. And the best way for situations to improve is to be openly aware of what works and what doesn’t, to understand the logical and the emotional, and to remember enough to learn without being trapped by the past.

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A Good Week In Progress

Posted on May 18, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

How about some good news? This week held so much good news that I had to take notes. Enough happened that I had to make some adjustments to me.

So, here we go. To all of you who have graciously listened to my challenges, here are some celebrations. The really good news is that they don’t all fit into one category. To paraphrase myself from facebook, “I just had such a good week that I treated myself to a copy of The Last Supper Catering Company by Michaelene McElroy. Details to follow.” I’m starting with small celebration. Here are some of those details. You decide if they require bigger celebrations.

Within the last seven days:

  • I’ve watched GIG go up 50% (and then fall back a bit),
  • Sold some books,
  • Sold a print, and got paid for another,Rock Garden In Green Water
  • Taught a class about LinkedIn,
  • Learned that students are registering for my classes and workshops at WICEC,
  • Logged my first solid week as Information Manager for New Road Map,
  • Made some nice progress for HCLE’s Virtual Museum,
  • Signed up another large client that needs a lot of work done to a close deadline,
  • Found out that another author wants help with publishing and social media,

and just when I was learning how to integrate so many good things into my previous stream of not-so-good news,

  • Watched my portfolio jump 41% in one day because RSOL was up 129% and MVIS was up 19%.

Oh yeah, and my back improved enough, and I learned some new coping strategies, so I was able to enjoy dancing Tuesday evening. (Thank you, Dr. Craig Weiner, for the professional help. Thank you, fine dancers, for the dancing.)

Wednesday’s post cheered on GigOptix as its stock, GIG, rose rapidly. In a phone call with one friend, and when I met another while shopping, I made a point of thanking them for listening for the couple of years, and that I was making sure they heard the good news, too. I passed along the good news I had at the time. Foul weather friends should be invited to the eventual good news celebrations.

I know that every phone call, every email, every reply to a post can be the news that makes my day, my week, my life; and that there is rarely any warning. Therein lives my optimism, that and the 10,000 Hour Rule. Unfortunately, the last two years have been a list of preponderantly unfortunate events. Despite my optimism, I found myself prepared for the letdown whenever I heard something good. This week’s good news came in so steadily that each item didn’t get a chance to settle before the next one arrived. By Friday afternoon, trying to incorporate and respect each and the total meant I had to quit work early (5pm! instead of 7, 8, or 9!) and sit on the deck with a glass of red wine (from a fine box), and ponder.

The sum of the good news is a marvelous improvement over recent history, but I continued to feel cautious. In my optimism I knew that, aside from windfalls like winning the lottery jackpot, recoveries take time and are not delivered with guarantees. A marvelous week can be the sign of having passed the lowest point, and is the beginning of the rise. That is worth celebrating. It is also worth respecting the necessary next steps. Keep at it, whatever it is. If this good fortune continues, it will probably involve a lot of work; but, that’s okay. The way things are lined up now, I’ll replace working hard at little pay for working hard enough to cover many, if not all, of my bills. Working for a living. I’ve heard of that before. It’s an improvement over just Working.

I felt better. But, something was unresolved as I sat and pondered. What was I missing?

Most of the financial gain required no more work at all. I say “no more” because work was involved, but it was done months and years ago. My years of work at books and photos have created online opportunities so people can buy without any more effort from me. The clients were unsolicited, no cold calling or marketing or advertising involved. Consulting and teaching are things I would do for no pay, though I’ll value them so others will too. The largest financial improvement was the jump in my portfolio. My effort there was time spent in research years ago (an element of Long Term Buy and Hold, aka LTBH), and a deliberate effort over the recent months to maintain at least some investments while paying most of my bills. Recover enough from the investments and debts are more easily paid. All of those items are either partly or completely passive income that frees me to spend time living rather than just working.

Logically, I saw the boundary my emotion didn’t want to cross. As I said on Wednesday, “See, I told you it was hard to believe.” Whether caution is American Puritan values, humility, realism, or a guard against hubris, we discourage ourselves from dreaming big. What would you really do if you won the lottery? MVIS, RSOL, GIG just provided evidence that they may be as grossly undervalued as I logically expect. I can calculate expected values for each. I can daydream about living with such a net worth. But, I did that just a few years ago, followed by the aforementioned unfortunate events; so, my current emotions balked at committing to expecting such levels of comfort and ease. It wants more proof. Don’t spend it until you make it. Besides, if it’s passive income, there’s nothing to do but wait without getting in its way. Relax. Let it happen. And remember to enjoy it. And that’s why I bought a book. My emotions can use a bit of proof, and if we saved up every celebration to the end are only parties would be great wakes.

These recent weeks have felt like a series of small steps in the right direction. This week, and these last couple of days, feel like genuine progress and increasing momentum. Small celebrations will be followed by larger ones. I hope you can, at least vicariously, enjoy the recovery.

It was, and is, a good week. It is Saturday afternoon. The week isn’t over yet. There’s time for more good news.

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Go GigOptix Go

Posted on May 15, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

Go GigOptix! Go! In the last few days, GIG stock has gone up over 50%. Come on, tiny GIG. Keep that up and I might stay out of foreclosure. Don’t worry though. You don’t have to do it all on your own. AMSC, MVIS, and RSOL are helping too. Sort of. Well, maybe I shouldn’t mention it. Thinking that my public opinion can jinx a stock suggests more power than I think I have. Yet earlier celebrations stalled after posting the hurrah here. But hey, good news is happening, and maybe these stocks are having stuttering starts,  like the punctuated rumbling of dragsters before they release the brakes. Okay, my race is begun. Go GigOptix! Go!

For those that follow my stock activity, there’s been little to follow for the last year or so. On a macro scale, the markets have surged as big money went into big stocks, which is why the market indices hit new highs. My style of investing in much smaller companies languishes at such times, but eventually should succeed because small companies making progress become big companies which is eventually reflected in their stock prices and market caps – theoretically. Unfortunately, theoretically is working with the later part of eventually rather than the sooner part. That disconnect happening simultaneously across my portfolio at the same time that jobs are tight and houses were hard to sell meant that my semi-retired status radically retreated.

GIG now joins the group of AMSC, MVIS, and RSOL that have abruptly risen. The extrapolation of those successes is a fun exercise, but in each case the abrupt rise significantly slowed. Stocks don’t rise forever. Their prices are driven by investors who, until recently were mostly human. Investors take breaks. They also take profits. They also take time to decide what to do next. They wait for more news. And frequently, they wait to see what the other investors will do. Almost all of those stocks have recovered back to where they were in May 2012, only a year ago. A year ago I was already scrambling to find a life-sustaining income because my stocks had dropped so far. I require a greater recovery.

If you’ve never heard of GigOptix and wonder why I own shares, I have some other posts that describe GIG and all my stocks. The quick story on GIG is simple and dull, unless you’re a nerd, but key to the now everyday experience of streaming videos. GigOptix makes switches. See, I said it was dull. But they make some of the fastest switches in the world that allow for the increase in network bandwidth. The switches have very few moving parts. And GigOptix has very few competitors. As telecoms advertise 2G, 3G, 4G, and more, they are also advertising higher bandwidths which operate at higher frequencies which require faster switches. Sounds great.

I even think there is good data behind much higher valuations for GIG. The stock price is about the same as the revenue per share. A price to sales ratio of one is typical for a construction company, not for an electronics firm, not for a high tech firm, not for a leader in their industry, and not for a company in an expanding market with little competition. I usually use a conservative price to sales ratio of about six for a mature tech firm. Usually such a well-positioned company commands a premium and the price to sales can be as high as, well as high as the expectations of the investment community. Back in the days of bubbles, a price to sales of twenty wouldn’t be a surprise for such an investment. Within the world of my small cap stocks, we’re just coming out of the negative mirror image of the bubble.

About two months ago, my old posts about GIG and its earlier trading symbols of GGOX and LMRA began getting unexpected and international traffic. What community was interested and why? They didn’t leave notes, but I picked up hope.

I like my portfolio, despite its recent performance. AMSC’s superconductors and Tres Amigas projects are what the nation needs for improving power transmission efficiency. GERN may yet prove that at least one of their innovative cancer treatments radically improve and change the health care industry. You’ve heard about GIG. MVIS is always on the cusp of something stellar with their projectors that are so small that we may see them proliferate the same way cameras are part of so many devices. RSOL is in the solar industry, which should be an emerging market. If rational valuations had remained the norm, I believe that Dendreon’s success with Provenge wouldn’t have resulted in a crash in DNDN, the rest of my portfolio would be healthier, and I’d be spending more time volunteering for non-profits. Instead, I’m helping to run them (thank you HCLE as Project Director and NRM as Information Manager) for a fee.

My experience of the last few years is why I contend that my style of investing (Long Term Buy and Hold, LTBH) is only for those who can tolerate risk. I didn’t expect my tolerance to be so painfully tested. Of course, I hoped to demonstrate that tolerating some risk provides the opportunity to experience above average rewards. That style had been successful for thirty years, and then I wrote a book about it (the basis for this blog), and it came out as the financial system radically changed and imploded. Dream. Invest. Live. With timing and seemingly jinxing like that, you might understand why I am reluctant to publicly celebrate investing success.

This blog is becoming known for its openness. That openness is intentional because so much of our lives are defined by the flow of money, and yet that’s where we hold many taboos. Some of the most passionate people, artists, are very aware of the positive emotional value of compliments and good graces, and simultaneously the necessarily unpassionate value of sales. I’m fortunate enough to have some small portfolio remaining. Its contribution to my financial recovery is necessarily part of my story; therefore, I tell it.

If my recovery relied solely on my portfolio, then my portfolio would have to grow twelve-fold to get back to where it was when I started looking for jobs. The greatest reduction has been my sales of DNDN which ran out about six months ago, which is also when I stopped paying my mortgage. (The mortgage and foreclosure news is so confused, good and bad and odd, that I can’t find a way to write about it, yet.) The part that is hard to believe emotionally is that logically my portfolio can be worth much more than a twelve-fold growth based on mathematical analyses of the companies’ potentials. MVIS’s potential valuations are so high that most investors are embarrassed to mention them, especially considering how many times MicroVision has postponed their success. But it isn’t hard to imagine such a pervasive technology becoming a $5,000,000,000 company, which means a hundred-fold increase in the stock. (See, I told you it was hard to believe.)

If my recovery relied solely on my consulting and art business, and on my part-time jobs, then some radical raises in sales and rates are required. It is possible. Walking Thinking Drinking Across Scotland Best-sellers do happen and Walking Thinking Drinking Across Scotland continues to slowly increase its sales. Larger consulting jobs continue to arrive. Unexpected opportunities can work wonders.

Selling my house actually doesn’t have as large of an effect on my recovery because it doesn’t add wealth. The house sale limits the debt I’m accruing. The weaker effect is why selling my house is one of my later backup plans.

I don’t expect GIG to be my sole solution. I don’t expect anything shy of a lottery jackpot to take on such a role. But I will cheer on each positive, hopefully adding energy and enthusiasm into my life emotionally, and financially. So, Go GigOptix! Go!

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Involuntary Vacation

Posted on May 11, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

Self-fulfilling prophecy or coincidence or proof that I know what I am writing about, I’m on a bit of an involuntary vacation. As I wrote in an earlier post,
“Days off are usually imposed by mental, emotional, or physical exhaustion – during which they aren’t making money, which therefore requires them to work harder.”
I was talking about “them”, my friends who are required to be workaholics to avoid becoming homeless and hungry. It also describes me, as I sit here with a tweaked back, a sore throat, and a recovering headache. I have a few work chores to do, and after that, I’ll be relaxing because I have to. My karate lessons remind me of the advice so many of us hear to stop and enjoy the moment. If we don’t, the world will make us stop.

Yesterday, I had a break from my irregular, though packed, work schedule. I’m one of two Site Stewards for a property managed by Whidbey Camano Land Trust: Hammon’s Preserve. WCLT - Hammons It is spring and time to whack the weeds. Blackberries, holly, English Ivy, Scotch Broom, and thistles are claiming the land faster than the indigenous plants can reclaim their territory. That’s the way of invasive plants. We try to repel the invasion.

I waded into a thicket of thorns where the wild roses were fighting the blackberries. Thank you Carhartt and denim for keeping the scratches to a minimum. But the thorn pricks weren’t as painful as some innocuous muscle movement that tweaked my back and changed my posture until I was much shorter and a lot less graceful. I tried walking off the pain, which helped a bit, and then went back to work hoping more careful movement would be more therapeutic than doing nothing and letting the muscles lock up.

My back and I have had such negotiations for 25 years. In one month back in 1988 I fell into a crevasse while climbing Mt. Rainier, was dropped on my head in karate, and became severely dehydrated during a marathon that wasn’t able to supply water for those of us in the back half of the pack. Any of those things, and probably some combination of them, could be the cause. One month, I was flexible enough to sit on the floor, legs straight out in front, and touch my head to the floor. The next month, I was dragging around a sciatica-pained leg, hip, and back. The x-rays showed that something in my lower back collapsed. I’ll spare you the years of research and experimentation that resulted in some fairly effective coping strategies. Effective, not but a panacea, evidently.

An excellent video by a friend gave me useful insight into cause and effect; or as I put it, reason versus excuse; or in another way, culprit versus scapegoat. Blame the blackberries? No. Blame the working conditions? No. Take it as a hint that I should’ve stayed home and worked instead of volunteering? No. Skip the blames and the hints and realize that my body feels pain because my emotions were wrapped tight from too much work and not enough relaxation. With decades of knowing myself, it’s easy to see; but, only in retrospect. Most folks know the soreness from eye strain, or the sore neck from poor posture in front of the computer. I’ve managed to carry those tensions down through my shoulders, into my chest, and beyond. Years ago, my chest pains were so intense that doctors required EKGs and treadmill tests, only to prescribe red wine and liquor. (The longer version of the story is in Walking Thinking Drinking Across Scotland because it inspired the trip.) Lighten up, dude. When everything is so tight, nothing moves right. The slightest upset throws things out of balance, and it can take a long time to recover.

In the first few minutes of Dr. Craig Weiner’s video about EFT , he tells a great tale about hurting his back while gardening. He does a good job of following that management analysis tool of asking Why?, Why?, Why?, Why?, Why?; which is remarkably close to the same technique kids use to exasperate their parents. Maybe five-year-olds have things to teach upper level managers. And yes, after this post is published I’ll watch the rest of the video again. His description of EFT is good. Others have suggested it, and I admit it is more effective than I expected.

I wound my emotions up because I had good news. I understand if you think that’s a silly reaction. The good news was that I got a 10 hour per week job as Information Manager of New Road Map Foundation. The emotional turmoil arose when I began understanding what a difference it would make. I have many Dammed Plans that I look forward to releasing, but the money from a quarter-time job, while greatly appreciated, only meant I delay selling my few remaining shares of stock from my dwindled IRA. The plans remained dammed. Enthusiasm thwarted, turned back on itself; which, I turned back into renewed energy for my other projects. (Work on the movie progresses, but the script is being re-written.) But life isn’t that simple. For most folks, until there’s enough, there’s worry.

My emotions were tight. My muscles responded. A slight upset and suddenly I couldn’t do as much as I could before. When I got home I tried to work but the discomfort required me to lay down. The frustration made me give up. And a little while later I realized that my body and my mind had imposed a vacation.

Two events put my workaholic habit into perspective. Another friend who is undergoing a financially required mid-life-redefinition is also working hard at a few jobs while also taking classes (less than a year and a half to go!). Evidently, healthy living wasn’t enough to prevent a heart attack. Last night, there was a house fire in my old neighborhood of downtown Langley. It was the house across the street from my first address on Whidbey. In both cases, everyone survived events that were understandably unexpected. My back’s incentive to relax seems more like an opportunity to sit back (or lay down) and concentrate on and appreciate what I have here and now. As a responsible adult, I have to consider what’s next; but, I think I was just delivered some evidence that I’ve done more than enough of that. I’ve gnawed on that rock long enough.

One of the lessons in karate is, “Tight. No Tight.” Being tight all the time wears a person out. The only way to survive a prolonged struggle is to only be tight when necessary, and to be loose, or “No Tight”, the rest of the time.

I think that’s one reason I no longer watch TV. The media and the ads maintain a tension throughout every moment. There is an urgency to everything, and then the next thing too. We have plenty of work to do, and it must be done, but if that’s all we do we might hurt ourselves in ways that mean we can’t finish. So, I’ve got a few emails accounts to check for timely messages, and a few notices to release, but I’m sitting here with a persistent reminder that today, and maybe tomorrow too, is a time to do a little less now so I can do a lot more later. I declare a vacation.

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Get A Job Do Less

Posted on May 8, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

Good news everybody! I got a job! Add that to the other one and I’m three-quarters of the way to half-time employment. If I keep this up I’ll be able to work a lot less.

Yesterday I signed a contract as a contractor. For about ten hours a week, I’ll be managing the electronic presence of New Road Map Foundation (aka financialintegrity.org and host of the Simple Living Forums.) NRM logo I am now the Information Manager. (Reminder to self: update resumes.) It is a welcome and surprising return to the organization where I’d been the board Secretary. Now, lets see if I can do as good a job as the previous manager who just managed to get a full-time job (that undoubtedly underpays her for her talents, but maybe they’ll catch on and promote her.) Ten hours a week isn’t going to appease my mortgage company, but it does force the fears of “homeless and hungry” into retreat.

Until now, my biggest client and benefactor has been the HCLE Virtual Museum (also History of Computing in Learning and Education on facebook). HCLE Since the beginning of the year, I’ve been the (Interim) Project Director, a job that has been intriguing and a good match. The title and the job are keeping me busy, and are already on the resume, but until we find sufficient funding (hence the “Interim”), it’s a job that takes less time than NRM.

Those two jobs, one as contractor (NRM), and one that started as a client (HCLE), add to everything else I’ve been doing: consulting, teaching, speaking, selling books, selling art, and helping people with their social media platforms and publishing projects. The long second half of that sentence is enough to keep anyone busy. As my financial turmoil increased, I increased my level of effort, striving to find a sustainable and encouraging lifestyle. Some of you readers are long-sufferers as you’ve empathized with my struggle. I’ve worked as hard as I can, actually a bit too hard, as I tried to find which efforts would help pay the bills. There has been lots of encouragement and I’ve generated lots of momentum, but I didn’t generate enough cash. I made enough to convince me to continue (thank you clients, attendees, readers, and patrons), and the growth is good; but, the worries remained.

My reaction to the NRM job has taught me a lot about myself and what I’ve been through. Logically, I assessed the task, my skills, the effort, and the compensation. Emotionally, I am still reserved. My emotional reservation is partly because this ten-hour a week job is not a complete solution. It is very welcome and a fair trade, but the foreclosure concern remains. I dug deeper though. Money matters aside, I realized that months or years of ineffective struggling included dozens of opportunities that never materialized, others that took weeks of effort but became nothing, or collaborations that cost more than they made. At some level I thought the good news was a mirage. I’ve seen a similar reaction in friends who haven’t had a date in so long that they don’t believe the flowers were for them.

NRM’s offer was a surprise. No job ad required, just a serendipitous meeting at the Commons in Langley. HCLE’s job was a surprise to both of us. No job ad required, just a serendipitous phone call about a different topic. It is possible that neither of those opportunities would have arisen if I hadn’t been working so hard on everything else. All of those other tasks were training grounds for what I do now.

Within the last two days I’ve re-assessed my habits. I am human. We humans get into ruts. Sometimes the only way to get out of a rut is by getting into another one for a while. That’s why I bicycled across America and why I walked across Scotland. I traveled for the traveling, but I also traveled to change. I got myself into a rut of work that was largely energized by hope, a very subjective experience. My NRM and HCLE jobs are energizing me with objective compensation. My rut had become working from about 8 or 9 to about 8 or 9, interspersed with time for mowing the lawn, making meals, and maybe exercising. The spread-out hours were necessary to get all the work in, but also to enable coordination with other people’s schedules. Now that money should be coming in on a more regular basis (did you read the doubt I unconsciously put into that first phrase?) I have to change, I get to change.

The unemployed are some of the hardest working and busiest people I know. They spend time and effort to make money any way they can because they must. Taking a break means missing an opportunity. They don’t get vacations. Days off are usually imposed by mental, emotional, or physical exhaustion – during which they aren’t making money, which therefore requires them to work harder. Unemployment can develop a workaholic mentality and an excessively frugal relationship with money that is unfortunately necessary and unhealthy in many ways, especially when passes it from temporary to permanent. Many people who lived through the Great Depression never left the mindset of lack. The title of a friend’s book captures their perspective, Trance of Scarcity. (The text of the book shows a way to change that.)

Monday night another friend called. She’s a sole-proprietor and entrepreneur too. One job sustains her. At least one of her passions may allow her to thrive. She caught me in the middle of my second spiced vodka martini (frugal details elsewhen). I needed something to break down my emotional inhibitions, something that would help me reset my perspective. I knew I couldn’t continue my old mindset, adding job on job. I knew I couldn’t just celebrate and stop work on the rest of my projects. I had to find that middle ground that acknowledged my new good fortune, respected and continued to energize my most promising projects, and that began allowing more time for me. The last part was and is the hardest. Talking to a similar spirit was immensely powerful.

Before my financial turmoil and portfolio collapse I was just beginning to explore what pleased me, what I enjoyed rather than what others had told me I should enjoy. Those important lessons were interrupted. It is time to pick them up again, at least in part; because, that effort is more valuable than many of the less likely projects on my list. Having a ten-hour a week job, with a few hours committed to another long term project, may not be enough to appease the mortgage company, but they do provide enough relief to begin to relax.

I look at myself looking at myself and I wonder what this economy is doing to many who don’t get that opportunity. Employment numbers don’t reflect that people who lost a middle-class job are replacing it with two or three that pay far less. Staying above the financial poverty line may require so much work that they are trapped below an emotional poverty line. I’m glad I have friends who have helped me through, out, and probably beyond my troubles.

Now, I’ll close this post. I have a job, or two or three or four, to do; and I’m going to make sure that by dinner time I also do a bit less.

My view - for sale

My view – for sale

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Recognizing Unexpected Positives

Posted on May 4, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

What’s that potato doing there? I almost took a day off yesterday. Somehow I ended up deciding to work on my garden instead of only sit on my deck. As I pulled up the grass that had usurped the veggies I found a potato clinging to the roots. Evidently, the potatoes I tried to grow last year had over-wintered and were coming back. I teased the thumb-sized starter from the weeds and quickly replanted last year’s project. A Persistent Potato Why was I clearing that bit of garden? To plant potatoes that had stayed in the kitchen long enough to start growing indoors. My efforts at this year’s projects are unexpectedly bolstered by last year’s work. The good news surprised me. When it’s been gone for a while, good news can be hard to recognize; but, recognizing the return of good news is one of the best ways to find persistent joy again.

Volunteers, charities, and philanthropists share the experience with entrepreneurs. Do lots of good work, and hope it makes a difference. If you don’t need money, then the waiting is easier to sustain. But many passionate, creative, and innovative people devote months, years, and lives to efforts that don’t immediately present a return. Being appreciated for your efforts only after you’re dead is not a good business plan, unless your main goal aims at eternity. Being paid too late can make someone the “Late Mr/s. so-and-so.”

America’s culture is imperfect, but it includes an acceptance of individual expression that is uncommon in the world. If you want to devote your life to foresting the land with fruit trees, take a look at Johnny Appleseed who wandered the east coast planting apple trees. Apple Blossoms (And wearing a pot for a hat. Handy in a hailstorm.) Clara Barton started the American Red Cross over 120 years ago, but first she volunteered to help treat the Civil War wounded – and demanded to be allowed to work the front lines where she was needed, not just where it was safe. At least one of her outfits developed a bullet hole.

America’s laws are crafted to support innovation, and inventors are expected to live with considerable risk. That certainty of risk is balanced by the possibility of reward. We can share in that risk and reward in many ways. Currently, I am experiencing the (hopefully temporary) downside of risk. Historically, I’ve enjoyed the upside rewards. The innovators’ experiences are amplified.

Thank you, Benjamin Franklin, for starting us off with role models for philanthropy and innovation, from the libraries to the wood stove.

Thank you, the un-named crowds, who volunteered and invented without reward; but whose efforts moved all of us forward.

For people who need money but are working without a paycheck, the lack of a guarantee that today’s efforts will be paid tomorrow is a tangible risk. Cruising through my facebook friends, I could probably list hundreds of people who are giving more than they’re getting, whether that is in charity or commerce. The intersection of the two, doing paid work for a non-profit, can leave workers waiting for fund drives or even just waiting for volunteers to find the time to write the checks.

During the dissonance, introspective individuals will ask those questions that responsible people must. “If this isn’t working, have I made an incorrect assumption?” It becomes easy to doubt the compliments. It becomes easy to question the complimenters. It becomes easy to doubt the work and the interpretation of the results. A friend’s title of visionary is earned, yet hard for them to wear when the only food on the menu is ramen. Which is the most appropriate bit of wisdom; “Persistence Pays.”, or “Insanity is repeatedly doing the same thing and expecting different results.”?

And then I found the potato.

I know people who’ve given up from fatigue. There are too many examples of people who’ve backed away from efforts, opportunities, and success, even romance, because they’ve lived so long with very little tangible positive reinforcement. When the offer arrives it is put aside out of habit or as part of an exercised defense. I had to pause and look at the potato to believe it was there. It survived when gardeners told me it wouldn’t, in a place with more than enough slugs, rabbits, and deer. Maybe the work is already done, and the only thing that needs to be done is a bit of weeding and a bit more patience.

In the past week, I’ve:

  • received an email with the subject, “You’re Hired”, for a quarter-time job,
  • re-applied for another part-time job I eagerly applied for last summer, a bit in disbelief that it was available again so soon,
  • mentioned the job possibilities to the mortgage company in a rare phone call, that may have resulted in them delaying foreclosure,
  • interviewed for a small part-time job that may turn into a consulting gig,
  • received a sweet offer from a friend,
  • and found myself wondering if I’ve overlooked anything because I know that each of those bits of news took time to grow from acknowledgement to understanding to appreciation.

I’ve been busy, rarely taking a day off, usually working until after dinner, and wondering if my efforts will be rewarded. I am encouraged because I feel that my efforts are building on each other. Maybe my most important task will be recognizing the financial equivalent of last year’s potatoes unexpectedly rising through this winter’s weeds to grow beside this season’s efforts.

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Have A Little Faith

Posted on May 1, 2013 by Tom Trimbath

The housing market around Seattle is turning around. Have a little faith and my house will sell. The unemployment numbers are looking better. Have a little faith and I’ll be gainfully (and hopefully pleasantly) employed. The fundamentals of many small companies continue to improve. Have a little faith and their stocks will eventually reflect that value. My business and my work Wind Prayer are gaining broad appeal (and I welcome the international members of the blog audience.) Have a little faith and the money will flow in as I follow my passion. I certainly hope so. I have a little faith; and right beside it and wrapped around it is a lot more faith. I think that will be more than enough, for me and more.

Sometimes faith exists alone; and left alone, it isn’t a surprise if it remains small. We are impressed when it survives such an environment.

Sometimes faith isn’t necessary. There are few guarantees in the world, but faith isn’t required to create a sunrise every day.

Friends ask me how I am managing to navigate my current environment. Faith is involved, but it is buttressed by math and reason. I have reasons why I think I’ll succeed. Those reasons are based in the fundamentals of our society. Hard work, frugality, sincerity, perseverance, and at least a bit of wisdom should suffice, sooner or later.

Of course, as more than one friend puts it, maybe the fundamentals no longer apply. The wealth and income disparities in the nation are examples of social worth disconnected with financial worth. A CEO of a failing company makes more than a successful teacher. Athletes make more than firefighters. Would we complain if the situation was reversed? Probably not.

I admit that there are systemic dysfunctions. Talk over coffee, tea, or wine (or tequila) and hear stories about the absurdities of dealing with insurance companies, mortgage companies, or politicians. Two friends told me about trying to pay medical bills in cash, and not being able to because the insurance company got in the way. I continue to retell the story of the friend whose mortgage company said they’d arranged a meeting between him and the governor of his state to talk about his mortgage. Congress amazes when they force the military to spend money on weapons the military doesn’t want. Enough farce exists to feed material to Comedy Central for centuries.

If the systemic dysfunctions are chronic and unresolved, then we’ll probably encounter some global turmoil. How soon? It may seem like such a shaky system could fall apart with one news report, which is possible; but, at the other extreme I see North Korea with decades of dysfunction behind it, and possibly ahead of it. It’s amazing they’ve managed it this long. I recognize and am aware of both possibilities, but I don’t plan for either.

My faith in our systems has been challenged. This much frugality, diversification, and persistence should not result in foreclosure and negative net worth. Yet, my faith persists; partly because of math, partly because of people.

Odds are that odds even out. Las Vegas is the greatest proof of that. The city in the desert was built by people playing the odds and leaving enough money behind to build, well, a city in the desert. The odds are small that my investments, both personal effort and financial, would result in less than enough to sustain or succeed. Yet, for now, those odds have worked against me. The pessimist extrapolates and expects the same. The optimist looks at the severity of the drop and mirrors it with an impressive recovery. Even a return to the mean would mean no foreclosure, and a return to a life of more philanthropy and fun. (My apologies to the charities that have been cut off.) If my financial net worth returns to my semi-retirement level, and then rises again as much as it fell, then, well, that’ll be a much happier story to tell. And I’ll have a new appreciation for the need to help people who are homeless or hungry or both.

Our systemic dysfunctions are our own fault. “Society” has allowed them, but we are society. We can fix them. We may not be able to fix them in time to alleviate my situation, but I’ll be amazed if someone doesn’t find the courage to put the common good ahead of their political career. Or, a new organization, whether organized or not, like the Occupy Movement may finally succeed in shifting public action and general lifestyles.A tiny house If enough people decide to live lives without mortgages, in houses that meet their needs instead of meeting advertisers’ illusions, in places where it doesn’t cost too much to have a job, and where their food and friends are near; then, the mortgage industry, the housing industry, the auto industry, the food industry, and the anti-depressant drug industry would have to respond regardless of Congress or pundits.

And here I sit, wondering if today is the day when the mortgage company will initiate foreclosure proceedings. I have great faith that I’ll have a new part-time job to announce soon, but I’ll wait until we sign the paperwork. I might even have another sliver of a part-time job. Add enough of them together with my existing clients’ work (one example: HCLE) and my worries about homeless and hungry go away. I have faith we’ll work out the details.

I have faith the house will sell prior to foreclosure, or that I won’t have to sell it because I am making enough money. I have faith that I’ll find or make that money through my business, my art, jobs, or windfalls. I even have faith in most of the depressed stocks in my portfolio. The businesses continue to progress, even though the stocks languish. The money that took the markets to new heights by buying big cap companies may look for bargains in the under-appreciated small cap companies; especially, if the small companies have big news. (Hey, MicroVision (MVIS). Now would be a great time to announce great and positive news.) Having a bit of faith, or even a lot of faith, is my best choice.

I have the greatest faith that, regardless of institutions and math, people take care of people; that, whether systems are dysfunctional or not, we’ll find a way for us to succeed. Our best choice is to have at least a little faith in each other.

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